To Be or Not To Be

Fanuel Muindi and Juan Carlos Escobar  

[dropcap]D[/dropcap]o you remember what you wanted to be when you were 12? I sure do! Well, I recently asked my Little what he wanted to be when he grew up.  I can’t believe two years have already passed since I was matched with him. He has grown so much since we met. Before I tell you what he said, let me take you back two years. You see, it has been two years since I became Juan Carlos’ big brother (hence he is my Little) through the Big Brothers Big Sisters of Massachusetts Bay.

After I looked around the Boston area for mentoring programs, Big Brother Big Sister of Massachusetts Bay appealed to me the most. I had heard many good things about it. I did not want to just tutor. I wanted a program that really focused on mentorship over a long period. I wanted to be part of a young man’s life as he transitions through an important part of his life. So, I applied. I was impressed with how thorough the whole review and interview process was! I gave references who were all contacted. I was also interviewed which actually allowed me to think deeply about my role as a big brother. I was happy to learn when I was accepted as a big brother and was matched with Juan Carlos.

It was a cold winter day in February when we first met. I was apprehensive but also excited at the opportunity to be Juan Carlos’ mentor. We were matched given our mutual interest in science. Of course, at the age of 11, interests can change literally from day to day. I understood this but I was secretly hoping he would stick with his interest in science. I was obviously biased but I remained fairly neutral and would always ask what he would like to do and make suggestions. Anyway, over the next several months, we met two to three times a month. It was essential to do so at this early stage. I needed to earn his trust. Our match advocate checked in with me from time to time and was very helpful in giving ideas for activities and strategies to engaging with Juan Carlos.

What kind of activities did we do? Gosh! Here are some examples: I have helped him build a robotic hand which was a lot of fun. We visited the museum of science where I got a chance to share with him my passion for astrophysics even though my background is in neuroscience. Of course, I showed him around my postdoctoral lab at MIT where I worked at the time. We went on bike rides, visited outdoor markets, spent time with each other’s families, visited book stores, built photo frames from scratch, and of course, visited even more museums! I was also very impressed to learn that he is quite a chef! I also saw first-hand his interest in robotics when we attended the 2015 Robotics Olympics at the Wentworth Institute of Technology. It is easy to see how such events are able to inspire young kids into science, technology, engineering and math (STEM). I was also honored to visit his school and talk about my research and tell the students about my path into science during his class. I left the classroom feeling inspired myself because the students had so many questions about my research!

It became easier and easier to talk to Juan Carlos over the following year. He was also helping me become a better mentor over time. This feeling continues even now as I think back over the last two years. He has grown tremendously and I have seen the confidence slowly rise in him. Anyway, where was I? Right, I was going to tell you what Juan Carlos said in answering my question about what he wanted to be when he grew up. Well, it wasn’t anything I could have guessed! He actually said that he wanted to be an Emergency Medical Technician! Intrigued by this answer, I followed up by asking him about his favorite subject. As it turned out, English Language Arts was his favorite! I got even more intrigued given the diversity of his answers. It didn’t end there though. He then went on to say that science was his number two. I was excited either way as these are all areas he is currently exploring and learning more about as he continues on his journey. Juan Carlos went on to say that he really enjoyed “chemicals and stuff”. He expanded by saying that he found the effect (bubbles) caused by mixing baking soda and vinegar very fascinating! I had to remind myself by watching this YouTube video!

“Perhaps chemistry is something he would enjoy,” I thought to myself. Nevertheless, I could see him grappling with his varied interests which was good. Of course, there was more. I then asked the following question: “If you could study anything, what would it be?” He immediately said computer science! I was like “Waw”! Again, he is interested in so many things like any 12-year-old should be. Remember the robotics competition I told you about earlier? It was clear that his interest in robotics was still alive inside his mind. I pushed further and asked him “why”?

He said that he “wanted to learn how to program”!

“Games perhaps”, I asked him.

“Sure! I really wish we could have more programming classes,” he said.

At this point, I realized that it was important not to push too hard on this line of questioning especially over the phone! Of course, it is a discussion we have been having for the past 2 years! I suspect we will continue to have it for years to come.

Over the last two years, I have paid close attention to his interests so that I can help him explore them further. I think this is essential at this stage. Around the same age, I was fascinated by planes. I really thought about becoming a pilot! This was what I wanted to be when I was 12! My own parents even bought one of those Microsoft Flight simulator game on the computer! Anyway, I should save that story for another time.

What makes this two-year anniversary special is the fact that he is also turning 13. It has been amazing to watch him grow up. It still is! I am also honored to be part of his developing journey. I am hopeful that I will be beside him in the years to come as he plots his own path forward toward his dreams. If he is willing to continue to work hard and take the initiative both at school and home, Juan Carlos will have bright future ahead of him in whatever path he chooses.

Feature Image by Luke Kondor titled “Inspired” from Flickr. | Image is unedited. | Some rights reserved.

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